Animals

When everyone has an opinion.

It is extremely hard to know which advice to follow and which advice to toss out the nearest window. Especially on the internet where suddenly everyone becomes ‘experts’ in whatever topic you have asked about.

It’s daunting and frustrating. And when the advice starts to clash with each other your head starts spinning and you’re getting one hell of a headache and just want to throw up your hands and say “FORGET IT!”

I’ve been having a problem with my Anubis and her eliminating in our bedroom. She is crated (I call it her den) at night, although she’s not to happy about it at first. She does well once she reluctantly walks into her ‘den’. It’s more of a “But I still wanna play despite the fact I have flopped over on the floor because we’ve been playing for awhile now.” type of reluctance to her den.

She used to be really good at going outside, but she isn’t a talker, which I think is at least some of the problem.

She learned early on that we won’t pay attention to her if she whines or barks, especially if she’s in her den. This is something I was very firm on as I know from experience that once you pay attention to them when they do a certain something, they’ll keep doing the something to get you to pay attention to them. She only barks if I’m playing with her or she sees the fat squirrel. Sometimes if she sees someone she doesn’t know and isn’t sure about. Generally she’s a person lover so I have no hopes of using her as a guard dog. Although once when hubby came home from travel in the early hours of the morning she sounded like she would rip him limb from limb and she was barely three months old at the time. It’s what woke me up.

Anubis will stay where ever she is until you come and get her. Every morning I feed the cats meat and I let Anubis lick the can (it has no sharp edges as it’s specially made) once I’ve dished it up. I’ve got it to where she will wait (impatiently I may add) at the kitchen door until I have placed the cat’s bowls on the ground and then walk to her. We go into the unused bathroom and I put the can down and shut the door. I know if I let her be, she’d sneak into the kitchen for a better taste. Problem is, she never says a peep. She once was in their for an hour as hubby had no idea she was in there and I didn’t get a chance to tell him before getting caught up in work. The only reason I knew she was still in there is that the bathroom we do use is right across the hall and I heard her move the empty can while I was using the bathroom.

Before anyone freaks she has water in there that isn’t the toilet bowl. There’s no water in that toilet anyway.

She does the same thing when she’s outside. She’ll relax in her chair or on her ottoman until one of us opens the door. She doesn’t bark to be let in, she will sometimes sit by the door (we have glass doors with floor to ceiling windows and her chair/ottoman is by one of these windows) and we’ll let her in when we see that. Otherwise she sits outside until the door opens.

She’s a very quiet dog, which I like and appreciate and I am more than sure our neighbors appreciate it as well. Even that one who has a yippy little dog that has on occasion barked through the entire night. Those nights we sleep with the windows shut and the fan a little louder.

I decided to Bing (microsoft’s google) “My dog won’t go potty outside” (I have to jump in here for a moment as when I typed ‘my dog’ into the search, Bing gave me suggestions. Every single one of them was “my dog is as smelly as dirty socks; just what mama needs…” and then some different words. WTF? Yes, I will be seeing what the devil that actually is later). Of course I got pages of sites that will offer me some insights to the information I am looking for. Some were actual articles found on various pet training websites, some on pet owner forums, wiki how (which is always so useful….nope) and a few on Yahoo (which I always ignore because most of the answers found there are absolute rubbish anyway).

The trick now is to sort through the rubbish and find the gems. And there is A LOT of rubbish. It also seems many people have problems getting their dogs to go out in the rain to go potty. I’ll assume you don’t need me to utter ‘duh’ to this as none of us are really inclined to go outside in the rain to take a piss or shit. Not that most of us do this when it’s not raining….but who knows, maybe you do. I’m not going to judge.

Sadly it’s not easy to tell from the search page right off if the advice contained on the link is rubbish until we click on it and start reading it. And even then sometimes one has to read through quite a bit before getting to anything remotely what you were searching about and it’s annoying to find that the advice means shit.

Now I understand we all have our own opinions on what needs to be done. Like with humans, some of the stuff will work with some dogs but not all.

What grinds my nerves more than anything are the people who insist that their way is the right way and then try to guilt you into believing their way and ignore what you already feel. There is ALWAYS more than one way to do any thing.

The first thing that pops into my head is an article I found on Today.com that was linked from a site I rather like. The article has no author listed, it is also listed under news. It’s old, 2006. It starts off alright. Talking about walking your dog and the best training methods.

After a couple of paragraphs the mysterious author tells us that we shouldn’t use choke chains or prong collars, that doing so is hurting the animal and perhaps you shouldn’t have one.

It’s called training because that is what it is. Yes, I use a choke chain as it has taught Anubis that pulling and trying to get in front of me just isn’t going to happen. Yes, she pulled hard and choked herself and sometimes still does, but I’m not a horrible person to allow her to do this until she passes out nor is she stupid enough to do such a thing to herself.

The same goes with the prong collars although I like them less, the training is still the same. Once the dog realizes that it’s much more fun to walk beside you they’re not choking themselves or making the prongs dig into their skin. Until they forget themselves of course.

I also use the pack walk method of walking. All this means is that Anubis NEVER leads. She is either by my side or a little behind me. NEVER EVER IN FRONT. I also do not allow her to go through doors or gates before me. Why? BECAUSE I AND NOT HER IS THE ALPHA. I choose where we walk. I decide when we stop. I choose how fast or slow we go. I am her pack leader and she must know this or you’ve already lost the dog.

Watch a pack of wolves sometime. Probably on a nature channel if there is any left on air. You can tell who is the alpha, beta and who is the lowest ranked member of any pack. Anubis is neither alpha or beta. That spot is for me and hubby, and yes he and I argue about who is which (I’m so totally the alpha).

Keeping this in mind, the author goes on to say that one shouldn’t use retractable leashes..at least not at first. Save them until they have learned to walk beside you. How the devil does that make ANY sense?? If they have learned to walk beside you, why the hell would you need a retractable leash??

Keep the same length of leash at all times. To keep your dog from pulling on his leash, you must teach him that he only has a certain length of leash available and that you’re in control of it. It’s a mistake to use a retractable leash in the teaching phase, giving him a longer leash anytime he wants it. Save the retractable leash for the everyday phase of walking, once he has learned how to walk correctly by your side and not pull you down the street.

When you hold the leash with your hand, it’s easy for your dog to pull away by forcing you to extend your arm. It’s also important that both your hands are free, assisting you in planting your body when he’s pulling. So wear a sturdy belt, slip the loop end of the leash around it, and fasten it snugly around your waist.

You don’t want the dog to pull you down the street, but by having the leash on your belt, how are you to control your dog???? You need your FEET to plant yourself, not your hands. Unless you’re pulled off your feet because your dog got excited and you were stupid enough to put the leash on your belt.

They of course go on to contradict themselves and making me shake my head to rid it of the crap.

How did I go from looking for advice about potty training to leash walking? Uh. I get distracted of course.

Even though I spent years as a certified veterinary technician there is always new things to discover and learn. Even if it’s the wrong thing to do. Most of the time however you have to try different things to find the magic one that works for you, and in my case Anubis. So far, taking her out every two hours (I’ve got a timer going) as well as keeping an eye on her and rewarding her with treats when she does piddle or poop seems to be working. Just need to keep this up until I don’t have to worry about keeping an eye on her all the time.

My dog is as smelly as dirty socks; just what mamma needs.

Until next time, animal parenting is a lot human parenting when it comes to people wanting to give you advice. It’s not a bad thing as long as you can freely decide whether or not to use the advice given. The problem comes when someone insists this is how it is done and there is literally no other way to do it. That’s when you are allowed to cry bullshit and laugh in their face.

Categories: Adventures, Animals, Family, Life | Tags: , , | Leave a comment

Does Being Surrounded By Idiots Lower Your IQ?

I really need to know. I mean not only when you meet idiots in your day to day life, but from the internet as well.

I honestly feel like every time I open my browser and just skim some of the headlines I am loosing freaking brain cells. So bad that I almost did an s instead of a c for cells. WTF!

Meanwhile, I guess because my brain isn’t working I thought I’d just compile the other posts into this one as I think there is good stuff in there somewhere. Sorry there may or may not be links.

The Friend Zone (I know many are very opinionated on this subject, especially the ones who have been so called ‘friend zoned’ but as you can see, I think it’s bullshit).

The “friend zone”: a nice catch-all that evokes the picture of a sweet, sensitive, ginger-haired lad looking forlornly out to sea whilst you, the lady he loves, gallivants around town with another. All he wants to do is make you mix tapes of his favorite indie bands and show you his rare collection of first-edition Dylan Thomas hardcovers, but NO. You just want to be “friends” (you bitch). You just want to enjoy his company without also wanting his dick.

The term “friend zone” has become so entrenched in our culture that it’s almost never questioned. A quick search for self-help articles aimed toward men shows that the “friend zone” is a regular focus: how to avoid the friend zone; how to know you’re in the friend zone; what to do if you’re in the friend zone. It’s almost as if no one is stopping to think what this term is saying to women, or how it affects us. It’s almost as if women aren’t the problem. Also, type ‘friend zone’ into google then check the images.

When men use the term “friend zone,” they are explicitly attempting to shame women for hurting their feelings. “Friend zone” shames women for exercising their right to say no, just as “slut” shames women for exercising their right to say yes (and “bitch” attacks women for their right to call you out on your horseshit).

By using “the friend zone,” men are telling women that we owe them something. It tells us we don’t have autonomy over our own lives, and that that should be decided for us. We owe them sex or a romantic relationship because we should be grateful that a dude—any dude—is being nice to us. Even though being nice is literally the bare minimum. You don’t get a cookie for passing the lowest possible bar of humanity. That’s great that you loudly proclaim you’re not sexist or racist or shallow or self-involved or abusive, but there’s no gold star for listing a bunch of faults you don’t have, or for doing what you’re fucking supposed to do.

“I’m a nice guy, I don’t do that,” you might say. OK, but do you stand up against men who do? Or do you sit there and watch while you think about how nice you are?

Women are constantly told that our instincts and feelings aren’t as important as those of men. Don’t like being hit on at work? But how is he supposed to meet romantic partners? Don’t like it when strange, greasy guys at the club say you have fuckable titties? Maybe you should learn to take a compliment! It’s funny how often “You need to learn how to take a compliment” is said by fully-grown men who still have not learned how to take rejection. If a woman tells you she fears for her safety because of street harassment, and your main concern is that you now can’t hit on strangers on the street, then I would reconsider your fucking priorities. If you think women are crazy for not accepting your compliments, you’ve never had the unique experience of being hit on by a man, then the same man threatening to kill you in the time it takes you to say, “no thanks.”

Often, the love-stricken friend in this non-existent “zone” launches into a volley of romantic gestures: he sends you little hello texts every morning, he comes to all your house parties, he likes everything you post on Facebook and he tells all his friends about you. Sweet. Charming. Harmless. Because he just *knows* you’re meant to be together, and if society has taught men anything, it’s that persistence pays off! Of course when women perform the same sweeping romantic gestures to men who clearly say they’re not interested, it’s seen universally as desperate and sad. Stage 5 Clinger! Stalker. Bitches be cray.

But if a woman tells you she’s not interested, she’s not speaking in code. When she says, “I’m fine,” what she really means is: She’s fine. Just like when she says “no,” it’s not a yes in disguise. Or a “yes if you pursue me.” Stop believing that women don’t know how to accurately express themselves. And stop believing that you can claim a woman because you saw her first, or because you’re positive you are exactly what she needs.

The argument that men can also “friend zone” women has been put out there, but it ignores one universal truth: women don’t see men as binary options like fuckable or friend. Of course there are the few out there who do and I’d be lying if I have never looked at a good looking man and thought he’s fuckable. Women have complex, nuanced, confusing, fulfilling, tumultuous relationships with women, men and non-gender-binary persons. Naturally, men can as well, but the type of man who claims he’s been put in the “friend zone” is explicitly telling you he is categorizing your worth on whether or not he wants to stick his dick in you.

“Friend zoned” men need to grow the fuck up and handle rejection like adults. Because the “friend zone” isn’t actually a thing.

Original content by Christine Estima. Some few things added by me.

The Four Horsemen (didn’t get very far on this one)

Ended up watching the documentary “Four Horsemen” and found it quite interesting. It’s not about the biblical myth, but the one more modern day.

The modern day Four Horsemen continue to ride roughshod over the people who can least afford it. Crises are converging when governments, religion and mainstream economists have stalled. 23 international thinkers come together and break their silence about how the world really works and why there is still hope in re-establishing a moral and just society. Four Horsemen is free from mainstream media propaganda, doesn’t bash bankers, criticize politicians or get involved in conspiracy theories. The film ignites the debate about how we usher a new economic paradigm into the world which, globally, would dramatically improve the quality of life for billions.

It’s from 2012.

Male Power Advocates (There was a rant building in this one, but warning, I never really get there. Don’t you hate that ladies? *wink*)

Gos is a womanLadies, did you have a pleasant International Woman’s Day? I for one did absolutely nothing. I did wear red, but since I didn’t leave the house, no one saw it. And I’m in Mexico so I wouldn’t even know if anyone would have made connection. But anyways. I did mean to make a post but I just couldn’t find the energy.

I have skipped reading a lot of my Facebook newsfeed because it’s almost all politics and trump this, that and I just do not want to read about the shit. Each thing just reminds me how fucked up the United States is and how much of a joke the country has become. I am seriously SERIOUSLY hoping that there is a big announcement on April 1.

In the spirit of women are awesome and apparently many people have forgotten this nifty little fact, I decided that there is always two sides of every situation. On the one hand we have women who since the dawn of time have been treated differently, it’s really hard for anyone but the dumb to deny this, and yet there are of course men who deny it loudly and are terribly upset that women have been allowed the few precious rights and “privileges” given no matter how small. And they’ll be damned if women are going to get any more of them.

These men who actually call themselves Men’s Rights Activists or MRA for short like to pretend that all of this is the worst thing that has ever happened in the history of man. Worst. Thing. Ever. #ManTears

James Fell described these so called men perfectly: “Imagine a kid who got a cone with three scoops of ice cream in it. Good flavors, too. Like peanut-butter chocolate, plus a scoop of cookie dough. In a waffle cone. And then this child whines about the lack of chocolate sprinkles on top.”

Personally I think it’s a bit insulting to children everywhere to suggest these males are like a bratty child. Even the brattiest of brats are better then these guys! Why? Because even at some moment, no matter how small, the brat will be happy. These men will never be happy. Even if trump was able to ‘Make America Great Again’ by sending us all back to the 50’s, at least in the gender equality area as there is no way we’ll ever get the country back to the way it was in any other area.

You already got the puppy one. At least the gist of it. Puppy. New. Awesome.

Until next time, find a way to keep that brain healthy, and active. Don’t ask me for advice on that one as it would seem I need to Google that shit myself. I need a cat nap.

Cat Nap

Categories: Adventures, Animals | Tags: , , | Leave a comment

The Words Just Disappear.

I have six drafts in my drafts folder (or whatever it is called) and I can’t seem to find the words I had to finish them. They were of course all going to be great posts; there was one about the so called men’s rights movements, one about the new puppy we’ve adopted recently, one on the mythological Friend Zone, and something about the Four Horsemen which was a documentary I saw awhile ago. All good, but once I started them I felt like people would only berate me for restating what others have said about the topics recently and I didn’t want to do that. The exception of course being the puppy.

She’s two months old, has beagle in her and is quite smart. She already knows how to sit, can pack walk relatively well, plays fetch like a champion and is house broken with barely any accidents. I’ve only had her for two weeks now. Talk about an ego boost on my part since I have felt like I’m not as animal smart as I believed myself to be. It could of course be all her.

She thinks she’s a lap dog, and since she’s about the same size as hubby’s size 16 shoe, at the moment she is. But if she gets as big as a beagle, she will have some difficultly crawling into my lap in the future. She’ll grab a toy or chew and crawl into my lap to chew on it. Or to fall asleep. When we play fetch and I’m sitting on the ground she’ll crawl into my lap after running full speed at me with the object thrown and play tug of war with me.

The cats are still adjusting. I’m afraid she will/does think she’s a cat. She plays with the cat toys, sleeps under the scratching tree, and curls up in BK’s little cave. I am having some difficulty getting her to stop chasing them. That’s the biggest rub they have at the moment. Of, and she likes poofy tails; which of course three of the cat’s have. Hopefully this will get under control soon.

Until next time, spay and neuter your pets. There already is enough animals in this world going unloved. Adopt don’t shop!

Categories: Adventures, Animals | Tags: , | Leave a comment

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