I really need to know. I mean not only when you meet idiots in your day to day life, but from the internet as well.
I honestly feel like every time I open my browser and just skim some of the headlines I am loosing freaking brain cells. So bad that I almost did an s instead of a c for cells. WTF!
Meanwhile, I guess because my brain isn’t working I thought I’d just compile the other posts into this one as I think there is good stuff in there somewhere. Sorry there may or may not be links.
The Friend Zone (I know many are very opinionated on this subject, especially the ones who have been so called ‘friend zoned’ but as you can see, I think it’s bullshit).
The “friend zone”: a nice catch-all that evokes the picture of a sweet, sensitive, ginger-haired lad looking forlornly out to sea whilst you, the lady he loves, gallivants around town with another. All he wants to do is make you mix tapes of his favorite indie bands and show you his rare collection of first-edition Dylan Thomas hardcovers, but NO. You just want to be “friends” (you bitch). You just want to enjoy his company without also wanting his dick.
The term “friend zone” has become so entrenched in our culture that it’s almost never questioned. A quick search for self-help articles aimed toward men shows that the “friend zone” is a regular focus: how to avoid the friend zone; how to know you’re in the friend zone; what to do if you’re in the friend zone. It’s almost as if no one is stopping to think what this term is saying to women, or how it affects us. It’s almost as if women aren’t the problem. Also, type ‘friend zone’ into google then check the images.
When men use the term “friend zone,” they are explicitly attempting to shame women for hurting their feelings. “Friend zone” shames women for exercising their right to say no, just as “slut” shames women for exercising their right to say yes (and “bitch” attacks women for their right to call you out on your horseshit).
By using “the friend zone,” men are telling women that we owe them something. It tells us we don’t have autonomy over our own lives, and that that should be decided for us. We owe them sex or a romantic relationship because we should be grateful that a dude—any dude—is being nice to us. Even though being nice is literally the bare minimum. You don’t get a cookie for passing the lowest possible bar of humanity. That’s great that you loudly proclaim you’re not sexist or racist or shallow or self-involved or abusive, but there’s no gold star for listing a bunch of faults you don’t have, or for doing what you’re fucking supposed to do.
“I’m a nice guy, I don’t do that,” you might say. OK, but do you stand up against men who do? Or do you sit there and watch while you think about how nice you are?
Women are constantly told that our instincts and feelings aren’t as important as those of men. Don’t like being hit on at work? But how is he supposed to meet romantic partners? Don’t like it when strange, greasy guys at the club say you have fuckable titties? Maybe you should learn to take a compliment! It’s funny how often “You need to learn how to take a compliment” is said by fully-grown men who still have not learned how to take rejection. If a woman tells you she fears for her safety because of street harassment, and your main concern is that you now can’t hit on strangers on the street, then I would reconsider your fucking priorities. If you think women are crazy for not accepting your compliments, you’ve never had the unique experience of being hit on by a man, then the same man threatening to kill you in the time it takes you to say, “no thanks.”
Often, the love-stricken friend in this non-existent “zone” launches into a volley of romantic gestures: he sends you little hello texts every morning, he comes to all your house parties, he likes everything you post on Facebook and he tells all his friends about you. Sweet. Charming. Harmless. Because he just *knows* you’re meant to be together, and if society has taught men anything, it’s that persistence pays off! Of course when women perform the same sweeping romantic gestures to men who clearly say they’re not interested, it’s seen universally as desperate and sad. Stage 5 Clinger! Stalker. Bitches be cray.
But if a woman tells you she’s not interested, she’s not speaking in code. When she says, “I’m fine,” what she really means is: She’s fine. Just like when she says “no,” it’s not a yes in disguise. Or a “yes if you pursue me.” Stop believing that women don’t know how to accurately express themselves. And stop believing that you can claim a woman because you saw her first, or because you’re positive you are exactly what she needs.
The argument that men can also “friend zone” women has been put out there, but it ignores one universal truth: women don’t see men as binary options like fuckable or friend. Of course there are the few out there who do and I’d be lying if I have never looked at a good looking man and thought he’s fuckable. Women have complex, nuanced, confusing, fulfilling, tumultuous relationships with women, men and non-gender-binary persons. Naturally, men can as well, but the type of man who claims he’s been put in the “friend zone” is explicitly telling you he is categorizing your worth on whether or not he wants to stick his dick in you.
“Friend zoned” men need to grow the fuck up and handle rejection like adults. Because the “friend zone” isn’t actually a thing.
Original content by Christine Estima. Some few things added by me.
The Four Horsemen (didn’t get very far on this one)
Ended up watching the documentary “Four Horsemen” and found it quite interesting. It’s not about the biblical myth, but the one more modern day.
The modern day Four Horsemen continue to ride roughshod over the people who can least afford it. Crises are converging when governments, religion and mainstream economists have stalled. 23 international thinkers come together and break their silence about how the world really works and why there is still hope in re-establishing a moral and just society. Four Horsemen is free from mainstream media propaganda, doesn’t bash bankers, criticize politicians or get involved in conspiracy theories. The film ignites the debate about how we usher a new economic paradigm into the world which, globally, would dramatically improve the quality of life for billions.
It’s from 2012.
Male Power Advocates (There was a rant building in this one, but warning, I never really get there. Don’t you hate that ladies? *wink*)
Ladies, did you have a pleasant International Woman’s Day? I for one did absolutely nothing. I did wear red, but since I didn’t leave the house, no one saw it. And I’m in Mexico so I wouldn’t even know if anyone would have made connection. But anyways. I did mean to make a post but I just couldn’t find the energy.
I have skipped reading a lot of my Facebook newsfeed because it’s almost all politics and trump this, that and I just do not want to read about the shit. Each thing just reminds me how fucked up the United States is and how much of a joke the country has become. I am seriously SERIOUSLY hoping that there is a big announcement on April 1.
In the spirit of women are awesome and apparently many people have forgotten this nifty little fact, I decided that there is always two sides of every situation. On the one hand we have women who since the dawn of time have been treated differently, it’s really hard for anyone but the dumb to deny this, and yet there are of course men who deny it loudly and are terribly upset that women have been allowed the few precious rights and “privileges” given no matter how small. And they’ll be damned if women are going to get any more of them.
These men who actually call themselves Men’s Rights Activists or MRA for short like to pretend that all of this is the worst thing that has ever happened in the history of man. Worst. Thing. Ever. #ManTears
James Fell described these so called men perfectly: “Imagine a kid who got a cone with three scoops of ice cream in it. Good flavors, too. Like peanut-butter chocolate, plus a scoop of cookie dough. In a waffle cone. And then this child whines about the lack of chocolate sprinkles on top.”
Personally I think it’s a bit insulting to children everywhere to suggest these males are like a bratty child. Even the brattiest of brats are better then these guys! Why? Because even at some moment, no matter how small, the brat will be happy. These men will never be happy. Even if trump was able to ‘Make America Great Again’ by sending us all back to the 50’s, at least in the gender equality area as there is no way we’ll ever get the country back to the way it was in any other area.
You already got the puppy one. At least the gist of it. Puppy. New. Awesome.
Until next time, find a way to keep that brain healthy, and active. Don’t ask me for advice on that one as it would seem I need to Google that shit myself. I need a cat nap.