I found this article today and although it is a few years old (2012), it completely resonates and expresses how I actually feel about America. I haven’t lived in America since August 2015. To be honest, we left because of money, but I had no problem doing so because I could see how horrible things were becoming for women. And then trump was elected and there is no way I’m moving back. My thoughts on each section follow directly below it. You can tell because the text will reach out further than the block quoted article.
Imagine you have a brother and he’s an alcoholic. He has his moments, but you keep your distance from him. You don’t mind him for the occasional family gathering or holiday. You still love him. But you don’t want to be around him. This is how I lovingly describe my current relationship with the United States. The United States is my alcoholic brother. And although I will always love him, I don’t want to be near him at the moment.
I know that’s harsh, but I really feel my home country is not in a good place these days. That’s not a socioeconomic statement (although that’s on the decline as well), but rather a cultural one.
I realize it’s going to be impossible to write sentences like the ones above without coming across as a raging prick, so let me try to soften the blow to my American readers with an analogy:
You know when you move out of your parents’ house and live on your own, how you start hanging out with your friends’ families and you realize that actually, your family was a little screwed up? As it turns out, stuff you always assumed was normal your entire childhood was pretty weird and may have actually fucked you up a little bit. You know, dad thinking it was funny to wear a Santa Claus hat in his underwear every Christmas or the fact that you and your sister slept in the same bed until you were 22, or that your mother routinely cried over a bottle of wine while listening to Elton John.
The point is we don’t really get perspective on what’s close to us until we spend time away from it. Just like you didn’t realize the weird quirks and nuances of your family until you left and spent time with others, the same is true for country and culture. You often don’t see what’s messed up about your country and culture until you step outside of it.
And so even though this article is going to come across as fairly scathing, I want my American readers to know this: some of the stuff we do, some of the stuff that we always assumed was normal, it’s kind of screwed up. And that’s OK. Because that’s true with every culture. It’s just easier to spot it in others (e.g., the French) so we don’t always notice it in ourselves.
So as you read this article, know that I’m saying everything with tough love, the same tough love with which I’d sit down and lecture an alcoholic family member. It doesn’t mean I don’t love you. It doesn’t mean there aren’t some awesome things about you (BRO, THAT’S AWESOME!!!). And it doesn’t mean I’m some saint either, because god knows I’m pretty screwed up (I’m American, after all). There are just a few things you need to hear. And as a friend, I’m going to tell them to you.
And to my foreign readers, get your necks ready, because this is going to be a nod-a-thon.
A Little “What The Hell Does This Guy Know?” Background: I’ve lived in different parts of the US, both the deep south and the northeast. I have visited most of the US’s 50 states. I’ve spent the past three years living almost entirely outside of the United States. I’ve lived in multiple countries in Europe, Asia and South America. I’ve visited over 40 countries in all and have spent far more time with non-Americans than with Americans during this period. I speak multiple languages. I’m not a tourist. I don’t stay in resorts and rarely stay in hostels. I rent apartments and try to integrate myself into each country I visit as much as possible. So there.
(Note: I realize these are generalizations and I realize there are always exceptions. I get it. You don’t have to send 55 emails telling me that you and your best friend are exceptions. If you really get that offended from some guy’s blog post, you may want to double-check your life priorities.)
OK, we’re ready now. 10 things Americans don’t know about America.
1. Few People Are Impressed By Us
Unless you’re speaking with a real estate agent or a prostitute, chances are they’re not going to be excited that you’re American. It’s not some badge of honor we get to parade around. Yes, we had Steve Jobs and Thomas Edison, but unless you actually are Steve Jobs or Thomas Edison (which is unlikely), then most people around the world are simply not going to care. There are exceptions of course. And those exceptions are called English and Australian people. Whoopdie-fucking-doo.
As Americans, we’re brought up our entire lives being taught that we’re the best, we did everything first and that the rest of the world follows our lead. Not only is this not true, but people get irritated when you bring it to their country with you. So don’t.
THIS is so damn true!!! I don’t even tell people we’re American. Although everyone assumes (this is GOT to be annoying for those who actually are NOT American; hopefully the assumption changes once they open their mouths. You can TELL an American when they talk!) this I imagine. I have yet to see anyone get hurt physically or picked on (in whatever way) because they are American.
2. Few People Hate Us
Despite the occasional eye-rolling, and complete inability to understand why anyone would vote for George W. Bush (twice), people from other countries don’t hate us either. In fact — and I know this is a really sobering realization for us — most people in the world don’t really think about us or care about us. I know, that sounds absurd, especially with CNN and Fox News showing the same 20 angry Arab men on repeat for ten years straight. But unless we’re invading someone’s country or threatening to invade someone’s country (which is likely), then there’s a 99.99% chance they don’t care about us. Just like we rarely think about the people in Bolivia or Mongolia, most people don’t think about us much. They have jobs, kids, house payments — you know, those things called lives — to worry about. Kind of like us.
Americans tend to assume that the rest of the world either loves us or hates us (this is actually a good litmus test to tell if someone is conservative or liberal). The fact is, most people feel neither. Most people don’t think much about us.
Remember that immature girl in high school, how every little thing that happened to her meant that someone either hated her or was obsessed with her; who thought every teacher who ever gave her a bad grade was being totally unfair and everything good that happened to her was because of how amazing she was? Yeah, we’re that immature high school girl.
How often do you think about the people in other countries outside of just seeing one of those “Save the Children” commercials? Do you know why those work so well? Because we have absolutely no idea what’s going on outside of our own country. The only time we care is when something horrible happens. The tragedies of the world is the only time anyone anywhere knows that something is going on somewhere else.
3. We Know Nothing About The Rest Of The World
For all of our talk about being global leaders and how everyone follows us, we don’t seem to know much about our supposed “followers.” They often have completely different takes on history than we do. Here were some brain-stumpers for me: the Vietnamese were more concerned with independence (not us), Hitler was primarily defeated by the Soviet Union (not us), there is evidence that Native Americans were wiped out largely by disease and plague BEFORE Europeans arrived and not just after, and the American Revolution was partly “won” because the British invested more of their resources in fighting France (not us). Notice a running theme here?
(Hint: It’s not all about us. The world is more complicated.)
We did not invent democracy. We didn’t even invent modern democracy. There were parliamentary systems in England and other parts of Europe over a hundred years before we created a government. In a recent survey of young Americans, 63% could not find Iraq on a map (despite being at war with them), and 54% did not know Sudan was a country in Africa. Yet, somehow we’re positive that everyone else looks up to us.
I think the reason we always think it’s all about us is that is exactly how our large tomb history textbooks tell it to us. Because, as well all learn in college history classes (should you have the desire to actually KNOW REAL history) the history given to us throughout our entire lives up to that point is bullshit. Tell me it’s not! Christopher Columbus? A royal fucking asshole!! It’s not really the young’s fault not knowing these things, we’re not teaching them these things so outside of college how the bleeding hell are we suppose to know shit? And truthfully how many are actually going to go TO college?
4. We Are Poor At Expressing Gratitude And Affection
There’s a saying about English-speakers. We say “Go fuck yourself,” when we really mean “I like you,” and we say “I like you,” when we really mean “Go fuck yourself.”
Outside of getting shit-housed drunk and screaming “I LOVE YOU, MAN!”, open displays of affection in American culture are tepid and rare. Latin and some European cultures describe us as “cold” and “passionless” and for good reason. In our social lives we don’t say what we mean and we don’t mean what we say.
In our culture, appreciation and affection are implied rather than spoken outright. Two guy friends call each other names to reinforce their friendship; men and women tease and make fun of each other to imply interest. Feelings are almost never shared openly and freely. Consumer culture has cheapened our language of gratitude. Something like, “It’s so good to see you” is empty now because it’s expected and heard from everybody.
In dating, when I find a woman attractive, I almost always walk right up to her and tell her that a) I wanted to meet her, and b) she’s beautiful. In America, women usually get incredibly nervous and confused when I do this. They’ll make jokes to defuse the situation or sometimes ask me if I’m part of a TV show or something playing a prank. Even when they’re interested and go on dates with me, they get a bit disoriented when I’m so blunt with my interest. Whereas, in almost every other culture approaching women this way is met with a confident smile and a “Thank you.”
Fake, fake, fake, fake. We have mastered the art of fakery, which is probably why we are soooo good in the movie/television business! We over use phrases and actually saying “I love you.” to someone whom you truly deeply love is hollow. And you can’t make it not hollow no matter what you do. My generation didn’t start this, I have no idea which one did but damn! We fucked up! Obviously it wasn’t the last time…
5. The Quality of Life For The Average American Is Not That Great
If you’re extremely talented or intelligent, the US is probably the best place in the world to live. The system is stacked heavily to allow people of talent and advantage to rise to the top quickly.
The problem with the US is that everyone thinks they are of talent and advantage. As John Steinbeck famously said, the problem with poor Americans is that “they don’t believe they’re poor, but rather temporarily embarrassed millionaires.” It’s this culture of self-delusion that allows America to continue to innovate and churn out new industry more than anyone else in the world. But this shared delusion also unfortunately keeps perpetuating large social inequalities and the quality of life for the average citizen lower than most other developed countries. It’s the price we pay to maintain our growth and economic dominance.
To me, being wealthy is having the freedom to maximize one’s life experiences. In those terms, despite the average American having more material wealth than citizens of most other countries (more cars, bigger houses, nicer televisions), their overall quality of life suffers in my opinion. American people on average work more hours with less vacation, spend more time commuting every day, and are saddled with over $10,000 of debt. That’s a lot of time spent working and buying crap and little time or disposable income for relationships, activities or new experiences.
I love living in Mexico. Not only can I afford health and car insurance, but prescriptions, rent and OMG FOOD. Not that I really need to eat more…ha. Here the point of life isn’t money. It’s people. I rarely see any homeless people on the streets. There are a few, do not get me wrong, but Mexico seems to actually try to do something for those people. When we told our housekeeper that we were moving and may not be able to ‘take her with us’ she cried. We don’t speak the same language and don’t have much of a connection – she cleaned the house once a week and sometimes we weren’t even there the whole time but she was genuinely sad that we were leaving. Now one could argue she was sad to loose a job, but it really did not feel like that at all. Our tailless Bombay (that’s a black cat btw) came over and started to give her love as he is the first to come to your side when you’re hurting, which he only does when you are really hurting (this is fairly a bad thing when you have an injury). So when we informed her that yes, we do in fact still need her she was beyond delighted. And since then we have learned she is a damn good cook as well!
6. The Rest Of The World Is Not A Slum-Ridden Shithole Compared To Us
In 2010, I got into a taxi in Bangkok to take me to a new six-story cineplex. It was accessible by metro, but I chose a taxi instead. On the seat in front of me was a sign with a wifi password. Wait, what? I asked the driver if he had wifi in his taxi. He flashed a huge smile. The squat Thai man, with his pidgin English, explained that he had installed it himself. He then turned on his new sound system and disco lights. His taxi instantly became a cheesy nightclub on wheels… with free wifi.
If there’s one constant in my travels over the past three years, it has been that almost every place I’ve visited (especially in Asia and South America) is much nicer and safer than I expected it to be. Singapore is pristine. Hong Kong makes Manhattan look like a suburb. My neighborhood in Colombia is nicer than the one I lived in Boston (and cheaper).
As Americans, we have this naïve assumption that people all over the world are struggling and way behind us. They’re not. Sweden and South Korea have more advanced high speed internet networks. Japan has the most advanced trains and transportation systems. Norwegians — along with Swedes, Luxembourgers, the Dutch and Finns — make more money. The biggest and most advanced plane in the world is flown out of Singapore. The tallest buildings in the world are now in Dubai and Shanghai (and soon to be Saudi Arabia). Meanwhile, the US has the highest incarceration rate in the world.
What’s so surprising about the world is how unsurprising most of it is. I spent a week with some local guys in Cambodia. You know what their biggest concerns were? Paying for school, getting to work on time, and what their friends were saying about them. In Brazil, people have debt problems, hate getting stuck in traffic and complain about their overbearing mothers. Every country thinks they have the worst drivers. Every country thinks their weather is unpredictable. The world becomes, err… predictable.
Oh my god how I love going to the movies. I have adored this luxury for as long as I can remember and have in the past 10 years become saddened as the prices of tickets and snacks kept going higher and higher. First it was tickets and a popcorn, drink OR just a candy. Then it was tickets, popcorn OR drink. Then it was just tickets and popcorn. Then just tickets, better sneak everything else in if you can (and boy could I! Bought a ‘movie purse’ just for the occasion I shit you not!). Movies here in Mexico is not only cheap, but it’s fucking AWESOME. Read that again people: IT IS AWESOME. There are two levels of tickets you can get; normal and VIP. Normal is awesome, you pick your seats so you don’t have to worry about getting to the theater early in order to get good seats. The seats recline. They are nice, comfy large recliners. Electric. Some people don’t even have this at home. The popcorn and snacks are great as well. There are many different types of popcorn; you’ve got your butter, your extra butter, your caramel, your chili powdered, your chocolate drizzle…you can get candy not from a box (well, yeah they have that) but like a gourmet candy shop where you pay by the pound (or rather kilo) and the drinks are pretty normal, except and this is for ALL of Mexico, ice tea has lime in it instead of lemon. Seriously in love with their ice teas. Try it. You’ll love it. And that is just the NORMAL every day movie experience. VIP is waiter at your seat, lasagna or pizza or sushi dinners, gourmet popcorn, candy, beer, whine, mixed drinks I shit you not people!! And all of this, including the price of a ticket is only, give or take $20 (this is without alcohol drinks). PER COUPLE. Oh yes, that’s the VIP. That’s the dinner, the popcorn the movie the non alcoholic drinks and even the damn gummy worms! Delivered to your damn seat! YOUR SEAT! Now when we went and saw Rouge One, we also got collector glasses AND popcorn tubs. And we also bought the three collector drink cups, and the collector key chains. This is stuff that even on opening weekend is not offered in the US. Serious collector items. And it only cost us about $20-$25 USD extra for the swag. Don’t get me started on the Internet. I have never had speeds this fast ever in America. We pay for 200gbs and we freaking get it. Check the image if you don’t believe me!
7. We’re Paranoid
Not only are we emotionally insecure as a culture, but I’ve come to realize how paranoid we are about our physical security. You don’t have to watch Fox News or CNN for more than 10 minutes to hear about how our drinking water is going to kill us, our neighbor is going to rape our children, some terrorist in Yemen is going to kill us because we didn’t torture him, Mexicans are going to kill us, or some virus from a bird is going to kill us. There’s a reason we have nearly as many guns as people.
In the US, security trumps everything, even liberty. We’re paranoid.
I’ve probably been to 10 countries now that friends and family back home told me explicitly not to go because someone was going to kill me, kidnap me, stab me, rob me, rape me, sell me into sex trade, give me HIV, or whatever else. None of that has happened. I’ve never been robbed and I’ve walked through some of the shittiest parts of Asia, Latin America and Eastern Europe.
In fact, the experience has been the opposite. In countries like Russia, Colombia or Guatemala, people were so honest and open with me, it actually scared me. Some stranger in a bar would invite me to his house for a barbeque with his family, a random person on the street would offer to show me around and give me directions to a store I was trying to find. My American instincts were always that, “Wait, this guy is going to try to rob me or kill me,” but they never did. They were just insanely friendly.
Yep. This one too. How many times were we told that we were absolutely fucking insane to move to Mexico? I’d be a damn upper class citizen of the US if I got money every time people who we didn’t even know who happened to over hear our plans told us we really shouldn’t, it’s dangerous and we’re stupid. It’s been a year. We have not been killed (sorry, not the first ghost blogger..of the spiritual nature at least), have not been raped, have not be stabbed, beaten, roughed up or even threatened. We were robbed once because we were showcasing a piece of electronic we had on our person in a bad area of town (waving around a digital camera), which you can’t do even in America if you are honest with yourself. We have been in a protest where the worst that happened is that I ended up having a ginormous migraine and I was tired. We had gone to Teotihuacan (look it up!) on Jan 2 of this year with a group of people (American college students) and afterwards were trying to get home. There were protests about the price of gas being raised here in Mexico on the first of the year so it ended up taking us 7 hours to get home instead of the normal 1 hour. We never heard any shouting, the people were nice as they could be, we just couldn’t talk any of them to let us past the blockades as we were having bad luck finding the leader. We ended up in a small town, asking the bakery there if we could us the bathroom which they opened up the store so we could and of course we bought a lot of their end of day baked goods and were happy to pay full price for them. Groups of people pull over to help one person change a tire. When we had a low tire, people kept coming up along side us to let us know. When we stopped at a tire shop the guy straightened the rim (we hit a pothole that would swallow a VW Bug. Our one big complaint about Mexico are the roads that aren’t quotas [paid] roads.) and put air in the tire and instead of charging us, we bought him a coke. Which was cheap. Like less than a dollar cheap.
8. We’re Status-Obsessed And Seek Attention
I’ve noticed that the way we Americans communicate is usually designed to create a lot of attention and hype. Again, I think this is a product of our consumer culture: the belief that something isn’t worthwhile or important unless it’s perceived to be the best (BEST EVER!!!) or unless it gets a lot of attention (see: every reality-television show ever made).
This is why Americans have a peculiar habit of thinking everything is “totally awesome,” and even the most mundane activities were “the best thing ever!” It’s the unconscious drive we share for importance and significance, this unmentioned belief, socially beaten into us since birth that if we’re not the best at something, then we don’t matter.
We’re status-obsessed. Our culture is built around achievement, production and being exceptional. Therefore comparing ourselves and attempting to out-do one another has infiltrated our social relationships as well. Who can slam the most beers first? Who can get reservations at the best restaurant? Who knows the promoter to the club? Who dated a girl on the cheerleading squad? Socializing becomes objectified and turned into a competition. And if you’re not winning, the implication is that you are not important and no one will like you.
This makes me want to go back and remove every awesome I wrote about the movie theaters. Except they really are. Another thing Americans do that no one in Mexico does is say hi when we pass other people walking or smile at random people if we meet their eye. Now people selling things or in customer service type jobs will always greet you, but the student walking along the street that you pass more in likely won’t return your Hola or Buenos días. It’s weird at first, but unless you’re my hubby you get used to it and stop greeting people. Of course he’s the more social of the two of us so he’s not going to stop anytime soon and that’s perfectly okay!
9. We Are Very Unhealthy
Unless you have cancer or something equally dire, the health care system in the US sucks. The World Health Organization ranked the US 37th in the world for health care, despite the fact that we spend the most per capita by a large margin.
The hospitals are nicer in Asia (with European-educated doctors and nurses) and cost a tenth as much. Something as routine as a vaccination costs multiple hundreds of dollars in the US and less than $10 in Colombia. And before you make fun of Colombian hospitals, Colombia is 28th in the world on that WHO list, nine spots higher than us.
A routine STD test that can run you over $200 in the US is free in many countries to anyone, citizen or not. My health insurance the past year? $65 a month. Why? Because I live outside of the US. An American guy I met living in Buenos Aires got knee surgery on his ACL that would have cost $10,000 in the US… for free.
But this isn’t really getting into the real problems of our health. Our food is killing us. I’m not going to go crazy with the details, but we eat chemically-laced crap because it’s cheaper and tastes better (profit, profit). Our portion sizes are absurd (more profit). And we’re by far the most prescribed nation in the world AND our drugs cost five to ten times more than they do even in Canada (ohhhhhhh, profit, you sexy bitch).
In terms of life expectancy, despite being the richest country in the world, we come in a paltry 35th — tied with Costa Rica and right behind Slovenia, and slightly ahead of Chile, Denmark, and Cuba. Enjoy your Big Mac.
OMD! Hubby recently broke his elbows and some bones in his wrist. I may or may not have blogged about this (so can’t remember who the hell knows and who doesn’t!) but for everything he had done would have cost us thousands upon thousands of dollars. We paid a total of $250. USD. And he got the best care at a top rated hospital. And the doctor spoke some English. We also got to keep the x-rays and copies of the doctor notes and reports. I actually like the selection of hamburgers found in the McDonald’s here in Mexico. I always get a McNifica. They don’t have meals either, you pick a main dish (hamburger) you can choose to have fries (papas is what it is in Spanish) you choose a drink and that’s it. Costs less then a normal non larger size meal at a McDonald’s in the US. Back to my McNifica if you check the link, what you see in the picture IS ACTUALLY WHAT YOU GET. There is lettus and tomatoes (although I’m not a fan of them) and it tastes fantastic! Just look at it! I did an English screenshot for you!
10. We Mistake Comfort For Happiness
The United States is a country built on the exaltation of economic growth and personal ingenuity. Small businesses and constant growth are celebrated and supported above all else — above affordable health care, above respectable education, above everything. Americans believe it’s your responsibility to take care of yourself and make something of yourself, not the state’s, not your community’s, not even your friend’s or family’s in some instances.
Comfort sells easier than happiness. Comfort is easy. It requires no effort and no work. Happiness takes effort. It requires being proactive, confronting fears, facing difficult situations, and having unpleasant conversations.
Comfort equals sales. We’ve been sold comfort for generations, and for generations we bought bigger houses, separated further and further out into the suburbs, along with bigger TV’s, more movies, and take-out. The American public is becoming docile and complacent. We’re obese and entitled. When we travel, we look for giant hotels that will insulate us and pamper us rather than for legitimate cultural experiences that may challenge our perspectives or help us grow as individuals.
Depression and anxiety disorders are soaring within the US. Our inability to confront anything unpleasant around us has not only created a national sense of entitlement, but it’s disconnected us from what actually drives happiness: relationships, unique experiences, feeling self-validated, achieving personal goals. It’s easier to watch a NASCAR race on television and tweet about it than to actually get out and try something new with a friend.
Unfortunately, a by-product of our massive commercial success is that we’re able to avoid the necessary emotional struggles of life and instead indulge in easy, superficial pleasures.
Throughout history, every dominant civilization eventually collapsed because it became TOO successful. What made it powerful and unique grows out of proportion and consumes its society. I think this is true for American society. We’re complacent, entitled and unhealthy. My generation is the first generation of Americans who will be worse off than their parents, economically, physically and emotionally. And this is not due to a lack of resources, to a lack of education or to a lack of ingenuity. It’s corruption and complacency. The corruption from the massive industries that control our government’s policies, and the fat complacency of the people to sit around and let it happen.
There are things I love about my country. I don’t hate the US and I still return to it a few times a year. But I think the greatest flaw of American culture is our blind self-absorption. In the past it only hurt other countries. But now it’s starting to hurt ourselves.
So this is my lecture to my alcoholic brother — my own flavor of arrogance and self-absorption, even if slightly more informed — in hopes he’ll give up his wayward ways. I imagine it’ll fall on deaf ears, but it’s the most I can do for now. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have some funny cat pictures to look at.
I am uncomfortable a lot of the time here because I do not know a lot of Spanish. BUT I AM SO VERY HAPPY HERE. I am. I am safer, get to see more things that many Americans don’t have the balls to try and I’ve met new people. I’ve found my KoKo and Yum-Yum (and even got to see KoKo today and feed him, which of course he ate like he hasn’t eaten in months which breaks my heart, but he came running when he heard my voice, didn’t even have to shake the container of cat food.), I’m learning about culture and how others act that’s outside of American. I see what’s important to people and what is a luxury. Mexico is not perfect. There are corrupt cops, we get nailed by them every damn time we try driving home through Mexico City. The roads seriously need work, but the highways are nicely kept and they charge for people to travel on those roads. Not as much as Texas charges us when we take their one road. $5.00 plus $1.00 to mail us a bill. I tried to create an account and get an actual tag, but I am not sure what the hell happened, never got a tag and can’t create a new account as some other account already has my vehicles on it, but the statements I get apparently do not have the correct account number??? The biggest problem I face is the fact that it’s hard to contact US business’ outside of the US. Specially those with 1800 numbers only. Funny how those numbers only work when you are in the US. Mailing stuff between Mexico and the US is a risk unless you go through DHL which can be pricey. The child support system in NM sucks so badly that I am behind although I am trying not to be but they DO NOT MAKE IT FUCKING EASY! Can’t mail a payment, can’t get them to direct withdraw (I’ve sent in the form twice by mail and once by walking in. Still not coming out of my American bank account every month) and of course there’s no online pay system. Which fucking baffles me. OH! And all of their numbers are 1800. I can’t talk directly with my case worker, they always have to call me back. To a message number which if I do not have my name on the outgoing message they’re not going to tell me shit about what I called about, just that they called. It’s 2017 NM, get with the fucking program!
Something else I like to point out is that I have not been interested in apples since leaving Washington State. I eat apples and apple based products regularly here. Apple strudel (OMFG YUM) and dehydrated apple chips. The local grocery store started stocking the apple chips more often since we discovered them. Costco just started the apple strudels in the café and it’s a challenge not to go every day to get a couple. Them raising their prices by 5 pesos a item helps a little with that, but not by much. Food seriously tastes better here. Whether it’s a McDonald’s, Burger King or Little Caesar’s (pan pizza is fantastic) even just a damn pizza! Dominos here has cheese in the crust, but it’s CREAM CHEESE. This is heavenly like you have never experienced before! There are little pizza places around that are great too. Pizza Real has awesome (YES AWESOME) thin crust pizza. Costco, the warehouse store has the most delicious Hawaiian pizza ever. Cheese all melty and gooey and the slices are huge! And that’s of course if you manage to grab one while they are still pretty fresh from the pizza oven which they almost always are.
Thank you to Mark Manson who wrote the block quoted article. It’s been republished in many different places over the years and I am glad I found it.